Yup... After the toilet and my behind get to know each other VERY well tomorrow ( or so I have heard ) I am going in for my very first, and hopefully only ever, colonoscopy.
See this all started years ago with a little pain. Progressively getting worse and worse each year until two weeks ago I landed my pretty bottom in a chair at the local GI office. After a brief and embarrassing discussion about my symptoms ( Come on folks, I can hardly talk to my OB about sex and my husband can't think of one time in almost eight years that I have pooped ) she told me that we need to do a... COLONOSCOPY.
I ran screaming out of the office, jumped in my van and pealed off as if it where a Camaro.
No... After she explained in graphic and horrifying detail about the things they are going to probe me with, I wanted to run. But then they said the magic word... Sedative. And I am good. It wasn't until after I scheduled the appointment that she told me what they wanted me to do... Before hand.
At noon tomorrow I have to take two stool softeners followed by drinking half a gallon of what I am told tastes like salt water. Then I have to sit on the toilet until my poo goes from solid to water.
Oh, and I can't eat after dinner tonight. I was told to take it easy on the food today to make fasting tomorrow easier... But all I want is to stuff my face with steak and potatoes. Sort of a hibernation prep.
I will keep you all updated. Follow me @vileramblings for live tweeting if I don't have anything better to do while I am sitting on my throne of awesome tomorrow. :-)
Cheers to getting your colon checked.